I’m just back from another week of training on the Hakomi method. I am finding it especially difficult to land this time around, maybe because, as one of my fellow students said, ‘feels like we all dropped into a deeper level of love and connection’.
I sat down to write what I had noticed during the training that I valued:
- I feel safe to be myself in whatever way this shows: vulnerable and teary, angry, touched and emotional, laughing raucously or confused and insecure.
- Even though I am in a class-like environment, where as a child I had to follow certain rules of behaviour which caused contraction and rigid holding, I now know I learn best when I tune into my body’s needs and honour them, and I feel like I have been given permission to do so there. I lay down, get up for a cuppa, seldom take notes, listen with closed eyes and carefully choose how to spend breaks so that I can better take in the teachings.
- My favourite mode of relating (mindful) is not only respected but valued. Which means I find it easier to slow down when relating to others and my system doesn’t get overwhelmed.
- There is sensitive, affectionate touch, warm connections and lots of tenderness as our hearts open in the exercises, the demos and the sharings.
- There is a huge depth of experience and connection shared as we play therapists on one another, a lot more than in my daily life, which so nourishing for a depth lover like me.
- The inner places where I feel inadequate or flawed are witnessed with compassion, held with love and explored with curiosity.
- There is space to explore the areas that feel loose, unfinished, untidy or pending and feel like I make progress.
As I wrote this list, I realised these are all qualities I would like to bring more into my daily life, especially at work. I thought I’d choose two, and aim to practice in the next few weeks. These are the first two I chose:
I want to give myself enough inner safety that I can be transparent in whatever emotional state I am wherever I am, especially at work, which I experience as an environment subtly but pervasively ruled by fear.
I want to give myself permission to honour my body’s needs, as I know I perform a lot better when I do, rather than feel like I need to follow certain rules of behaviour.
How will I bring those into my weekly shifts will be my next question… If you resonate, I’d love to hear from you!
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