Choosing between fear and trust

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure”. I have often remembered these verses from Marianne Williamson’s famous poem, lately. There is a part of me that is terrified of succeeding; as I girl I believed that I was sexually abused because I was too beautiful, so it is safer not to shine.

But after I have held my scared Inner Girl’s fear, heard it out, empathised with it, identified her needs and made sure I’ve met them, there is a point where a Loving Limit (*) is called for.

“You KNOW that you can’t get hurt if you succeed, because you can’t really get hurt, ever” says the wise, grounded, compassionate part of me. “Nothing that really matters is ever lost of broken”.
My Inner Girl knows that, she has had enough experience of it. But she still hesitates: “But I am scared of suffering!”
“I understand!” responds the wise one. “And are you going to let that stop you?”
“No, I won’t” she realises. “I can lean on trust and know that all is very, very well” (**)

I can lean on trust. Those words strike me. I realise that, in the end, living from fear or from trust is actually a choice. Once we’ve done all the inner work with our fears, resistance and wounds, it is really a matter of deciding what we want to do, where we want to focus our attention. And I am clear what I am choosing.

* (The term Loving Limit has been coined by Marion Rose).
** (The phrase “be still and know that all is very, very well” has come into my life through Eileen Caddy, one of the founders of the spiritual ecovillage of Findhorn. Worth having a look at her work and the community if they are unknown to you!)

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